Rev. Leo Booth
Unity minister, published author and conference speaker

Over the years I’ve said that it is important to know that sobriety is a development from a spiritual foundation and it involves seeing the world the way it is, rather than how we want it to be. Spirituality is reality.

With this in mind we need to realize that the world is in a recession, businesses are going into bankruptcy, people are losing their jobs, the stock market is crazy, banks are wobberly. It all sounds terrible. Anybody could be excused for being pessimistic, indeed depressed. But I am wanting to claim and affirm optimism; indeed opportunities abound in the darkest of times and being sober gives us an added advantage. Spiritual sobriety gives us a creative edge!

So, allowing for the fact that America and the world is going through a difficult time, what are the things that we can do to affirm our optimism, creating an amazing and successful sobriety?

Know that we create our reality

Things do not just happen in life, they happen because people make things happen.

Sobriety is a word that alcoholics and drug addicts have claimed for themselves, but it has a powerful meaning for everyone. A sober person is living a life of balance, they don’t compulsively react to life, they are not obsessing over every little thing that happens. No, the sober person has embraced a life of equanimity.

What does this look like? Well, many of us go to meetings regularly in the week to share, listen and get a sense of perspective, calming our stress level, knowing that God’s powerful energy is available to tap into. I can’t tell you how often I hear people say that before the meeting they were feeling anxious and depressed; after the meeting they are ready to cheerfully face the day.

It is important to have some healthy sayings in our head; an example is suffering is optional. The power of choice is important in living the spiritual life and how we approach sickness or life’s “many unhappinesses” can affect our level of suffering.

An important part of everyone’s life is relationships; the relationships we create in our life can make all the difference to the amount of stress, anxiety or sadness in our life. Being in a relationship with an angry, shaming or controlling person can affect how we interview for a job or create secure finances. Dysfunctional co-dependency affects everything; our health, spontaneity, recovery and our spiritual equanimity.

What do we do if we are in an abusive relationship? Well, confront it. We may not need to walk away from it but a major change in behavior is essential – and we can, as a last resort, always walk away. Suffering is optional.

I know many people who take a retreat each year. A time to “get away” and think about every aspect of our lives: health, home, finances, quality of sobriety, relationships…not least our relationship with Higher Power.

Recently I’ve been talking about a religious co-dependency that seems to expect God to do everything for us; fix every challenge in our lives. However, we forget that God’s love for us is a healthy love. God has given us freedom to create or destroy, smile or growl, remain lazy or make a healthy decision for our lives. I have been practicing a type of prayer that includes me in the petition:

God, I am making a concerned effort to create a healthy and balanced life. With You as my partner in life I am becoming successful, one day at a time. Amen.

This sprayer seems healthier than asking God to do things for me; it confronts the religious co-dependency I was raised with.

Optimism is contagious

I think it is helpful for recovery to be around people who are not only happy but supportive. People who encourage you to do things, think outside the box and if a project doesn’t work out you can always try something else. People who have lost a job are finding new work; some people are returning to school, others think about exploring a life in another country or move to another state. We need people who nurture us, saying ‘go for it’…you can always return if it doesn’t work out.

The very fact that we are sober tells the world that we are a winner. Nothing that happens to us today can ever be as bad as the prison of alcoholism. We start every day with the glass half-full and each day we can add to it.

Sponsorship is important during these challenging times. It is good to have somebody who knows us, really knows us, and can stop us from slipping into the negative thinking or destructive behaviors. The sober person does not deny the possibility of relapse, but they optimistically do everything in their power to avoid it.

“How are you Chic?”

“Good. What’s happening?”

“I’m feeling negative about my finances. I’ve lost a lot in the stock market.”

“No you haven’t. You didn’t sell so it’s only paper. The market will return and you’ll have more money. Be patient.”

“You’re so right. Thanks for the reality check.”

“Now, stop feeling negative. Go to a meeting. And remember to share.”

“Okay Chic. Bye.”

And so it goes. I’m never alone. I’ll never be alone again. This life I have today is incredible. I’m grateful. Herein lies my optimism for today and everyday.