by Bradley Quick (from his book "The Quick Fix")

The answer to this question will vary depending on who you ask, what school of thought they're from, and what their first hand experience is. Some will say it's an allergy of the body, an obsession of the mind, coupled with a spiritual malady, like a disease (dis-ease). Some will say it is an obsessive compulsive disorder, meaning you want it, and you want it now. Then you usually want more. And you always have a hard time stopping, if you can stop at all before passing out, or burning out.

Some will say its chemical dependency, others will say we're losers, making the wrong decisions voluntarily, and still others will say that we're not concerned about the well-being of those affected around us. (Au contraire, Oh wise one!) Others might even say it's the work of the devil, the fault of another, or that you're just the product of your environment. Then again, if you don't have a ticket, or you're not already on this harsh merry-go-round called substance abuse and behavioral disorders, maybe you can "Just Say No." But if you're already on this abusive ride, "no" is a virtual impossibility.

There is, most assuredly, a bit of truth in all of these opinions. I'm not disputing them, but I'm sure you'll agree that whatever opinion a particular individual holds, it is their truth. The fact is that using and abusing is now a real issue in our lives. We didn't plan it this way. You most certainly have become the individual that you didn't necessarily want to become. This is just the way it is right now, today. Don't worry; (Yes, the cat's out of the bag) all those people around us, especially those we're closest to, usually know all about what's up with us, our using and abusing, acting out issues etc.. It's much like that elephant nobody has admitted is standing in the middle of the room. Out of fear, nothing is said, and the hope is maybe it will just go away. But it never does. It only gets bigger and more intrusive in all aspects of our lives.

Here's the way I see it. It all started for us when we found the pleasure and/or relief provided to us from the substance(s) or behaviors in question. For a long time, using and abusing substances and/or behaviors was the solution to our problems, they brought us comfort. That pleasure, comfort or relief provided by these destructive actions, substances and behaviors may have been generated by different desires such as fitting in, escape, avoidance (more about this later), subconscious self-sabotage, core beliefs, the physical sensation and many more. Whatever the reason(s), it has led to our current state of affairs; constant or consistent self-abuse and discomfort and inner turmoil. Maybe your affliction is only periodic, yet still troublesome and worth eliminating. After we found that immediate relief or immediate gratification could be achieved through using and abusing, it was much easier to take the substance/behavior route than to rely on our own coping abilities, or lack thereof, to manage the situation. After all, which do you prefer, pain or pleasure? For me, my instincts tell me that pleasure should win out every time. Thus, affliction and dependence is born. My intuition, however, lets me know that mere pleasure is not always the best choice.

The issue is, once you've started using, abusing, fixing, avoiding on a consecutive basis, your natural coping mechanisms, the ability to deal with feelings and emotions, ceases to mature. Its natural progression stops. Think about it. Happy, sad, excited, depressed or angry, in hate, in fear, or in love, we again resort to our disorders. This continued substance abuse response to our perceived situations has created a vicious cycle where, in order to deal with our feelings and emotions, we must submerge them in our substance(s) or behaviors, then be a recipient of the consequences. We must use and abuse our substance(s) or dysfunctional actions in order to deal with life as it presents itself. It's becomes a downward spiral; the harder you try to break free, the more it pulls you to places, thoughts, or situations you would rather not be in. Not a very pleasant experience, is it?

Here's the big question: At what age did you start using and/or abusing on a regular basis? Think about it. Was it at age twelve, thirteen, nineteen, before then, after then? You decide, at what age was it? With that age in mind, I'll direct your attention back to the original question. At what age did you start regularly using and/or abusing? The truth is your ability to cope with feelings and emotions stopped maturing at the age your consecutive abuses (avoidance mechanisms) began. It's very important that you understand what this means. I began abusing substances (cigarettes and beer) at about age eleven or twelve. I stopped my substance abuse, including intravenous drug use, using the Quick Fix techniques, in May 1987 at age twenty-eight. Much to my surprise, I found myself to be that age physically but only twelve or thirteen years old, at best, in regards to my coping mechanisms, feelings and emotions. I was very distressed with life, and found my responses to be like those of a teenager. Left to my own devices I was sure to perish. I didn't recover all by myself, and you don't have to either. We never have to do this alone, but it is so very important that you have a full understanding of this age issue. Now that we understand it, we must also accept it so we can move on.

Take heart. I have devised a system through which you can reestablish and even enhance your abilities and learn to cope with life better than ever before. All it takes is time and persistent effort on your part to make these wonderful changes in your life and the lives of those around you. You can do this, and it's highly probable you will succeed! This is a tried and proven method that works if you work it. All you must do is make the decision to work it. Make up your mind that you're so fed up with being sick and tired, that you're ready for positive change. What do fear and change have in common? Take a moment. That's right, they both involve the unknown. With change comes fear. That's one of the reasons why change is often times so very hard to initiate, much less to sustain over any period of time.

Change for us is usually only motivated by pain accompanied by complete mental and/or living chaos. Remember, if you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting. If you want something different, you have to do something different. The Quick Fix Process is your answer because it helps you to do something different than you've been doing. This method will broaden the spectrum through which you perceive yourself, your role and your objectives, as well as the objectives of others. This process will bring forth positive change to be admired by all, especially you. You must understand. We are individuals who have lost the ability to control the use of our substance(s), or the inappropriate actions in question, and probably any other substance(s) or actions we may have shifted to in times of distress or condemnation.

Don't think for one moment that because you're having a hard time with scotch, you can just switch to vodka and everything will be OK, because it won't. It doesn't work that way. Nor can you switch from booze to pot, heroin to barbiturates, chocolate to caramel, Marlboros to Winston, French-fries to onion rings, excessive work to excessive golf, or anything of the like. If you do, you are just shifting your avoidance mechanisms to another substance or behavior, and not progressing at all. And please don't get caught up in the anti-depressant game. My experience says if you do, you lose. I once knew a man who, after seven years of being substance abuse free, began to get very emotional, and for a time was unable to control his emotions, or reactions to outside stimuli. This man sought help for his current state of mind through the psychiatric profession. He was prescribed an anti-depressant, and some five years later, I witnessed this man on more than one occasion without his pills. He was a monster, a completely unpredictable lunatic. It would have been more advantageous for him to work through his uncomfortable state at seven years than to become strung out for a lifetime on prescribed medications. Giving up one thing to become dependent on another doesn't make much sense, does it?

The real issue here is your lack of coping mechanisms and the substance(s) or behaviors which you've substituted for those natural mechanisms, so as to cope with this world and the people in it. You cannot afford to continue this way of living. You must remain abstinent from not only the behavior(s) in question, but from all related substances/actions. No more using and/or abusing! If your abusive substance is a mind altering substance (alcohol, drugs, pot, etc.), you must completely avoid all substances that affect you from the neck up. If your substance is cigarettes, you must learn to avoid all tobaccos, pipes, cigars, nicotine, etc. If you have a food issue, by all means, stay away from the foods you have an issue with i.e. fattening foods, sugars, starches, dairy etc. (Consult your local dietary expert.) If it's a behavioral issue, follow this same process and be free. One is too many, a thousand never enough. Do not submit to the obsession and you will not be swept away.

Every single one of us that struggles with using and abusing behaviors was born with a personal radio station in our heads. Much of the time, the volume is high, at level 10. At other times, it's lower, but it's always there. The programming on this station is always the same; self-sabotage, self-pity, obsession, drama, self-seeking, ego and fear. This is our own guilt and shame-based radio at its best. Here in California, a radio station's call letters always begin with a K, as in KNBC, KCBS, and so on. Our built-in substance abuse radio station that plays in our heads is commonly referred to as KFUK Self-Sabotage Radio. This is a joke that often seems so very real. Sometimes I begin to listen so intently to this programming, I start to believe it. It's at that time that I must stop and jump back into The Quick Fix Process in order to reexamine my perceptions and to become service oriented (by self forgetting one finds). I must always remember that I don't have to listen to what my head is saying. I can, and do, simply reply aloud, "Thank you for sharing, now shut up." At times, that's all it takes. Other times, I find that when I extend myself to others it brings me much relief. Always be of service!

We are all good people. That's not the issue. We are in the grips of a progressive dilemma, using and abusing, which results in inappropriate actions. In my experience, for us, it only gets worse, never better. As soon as we accept that we must change, at least the destructive part of our lives, we begin to grow toward a better future, a better tomorrow. It's your life. The world revolves with you or without you, seasons will continue to change, the tides will continue to come and go. The world and everyone in it can get along just fine with or without you. This world has been around for billions of years. The universe will not miss you. So if you must continue, be my guest. If you're still thinking you can use your substance(s) or participate in your destructive behaviors casually, I wish you all the luck in the world. My guess is you can't, you've tried. So let's stop trying (trying is lying)! The deal I'm making with you is that you take The Quick Fix solution with you wherever you go. (Better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it.) Apply the contents to every situation you encounter. Listen to the Positive Chat Power CD (most important), and watch the positive change begin. Okay? Do we, you and I, have a deal or not? If we do, take a deep breath, and let the change begin. If not, you had better reevaluate your situation once again.

Remember, if you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting. If you want something different, you must do something different. No change for you, no gain for you.

Here is your choice, so go ahead and make it now. Do you want to win or do you want to keep getting beaten by your abusive behaviors, your using and abusing, your negative actions? It's your decision!

Remember, self reliance is about as far as any of us ever got. An attitude of intolerance and indifference has generally been our code. Our best thinking got us into this mess, so let's not rely on ourselves to fix it. Let's rely on this process. It works, it really does. Though it's not easy, it's well worth it. So let's do it together. Let's consider this getting C.L.E.A.N. (Clearly Learning Everything Absolutely Necessary) from unsatisfactory behaviors and/or using and abusing substances.Thought: You're only as positive, or as negative, as the atmosphere you're in, and only as positive or as negative as the company you keep!

This is not about race or family of origin. It's about freedom from substance abuse and behavioral issues. It's about being happy and contented with life. Together we can stay free from using and abusing, alone we fall right back into destruction. Fact: If anyone else would have done the things to me that I've done to myself, I would have bopped them a long time ago. If you can be honest with yourself, I'm sure you can make the same statement. I'm willing to bet that through your entire life, you were never your own best friend for a variety of different reasons. That's how I was. For just for moment let's not depend on ourselves, but go through this process together. We can support each other and not have to be out there alone. Let's get started.